Music is therapy, a self-discovery tool, a storyline, and a companion. Hip-hop gospel artist Conrad Bridges summarizes that music is “a friend that listens and makes you feel heard and seen.” He shares that with its open-canvas nature, music and writing has become a tool for self-growth and deeper understanding.
While Conrad’s been writing for the better part of 10 years, he admits that he still doesn’t quite identify with being an artist. Despite releasing over 100 songs in the past year alone, Conrad Bridges is “Scared to Say.” This, being the title of his newly released single that explores all the elements of how it feels to be open with yourself. What does it feel like to sabotage yourself, to honor yourself, to communicate and express, to feel unsure, unclear, scared, and to ultimately triumph? Let’s dig in…
As humans, we’re riddled with complexities, and it takes courage to try to unravel our layers and better understand ourselves. In Conrad’s most recently released album Emotional About It, he embarks on his own inward journey, reflecting on what it is in life that he truly wants. A spinoff of this introspective process is “Scared to Say,” which he uniquely wrote overnight in the back of his 18-wheeler truck while working in long-haul trucking.
He shared that he had to take a hard look at what he was doing with his time, and if that really mattered to him. Was that what he actually wanted or not? Consequently, part of writing this track was asking himself, what do I want? Coming to terms with those answers isn’t always easy.
Sometimes being afraid to pursue what you want can manifest in self-sabotaging behaviors. Then you have to process the pain that you’ve unconsciously inflicted on yourself through inaction. But thankfully, music gives Conrad the platform and tools to express to himself and sort through his inner conflict.
When asked how he chose which instrumental music to underlay his lyrics and expression, we circle back to his sentiment about music being like a friend; a good listener. The beat that he played offered the space for his heart to speak truthfully and from there, he just let it all out. He noted that singing was the channel through which his heart poured, which was completely new to his style. But it boded well, not only as an adventure in trying something new, but also as a vibrationally cathartic way of releasing emotion. (Side note, there’s tons of healing science on how well the cells of your body respond to the sound of your own voice, so there’s something to this!)
His singing is then complemented by an emotive rap verse that dives deeper into some specifics of his inner turmoil. What turns up in this verse is acknowledging how lack of clarity within and not fully understanding what you truly need and want, can also affect others outwardly.
In the lyrics,
Communication
Always been hazy
With myself
And all of you
Somethings I need to melt
I don't know how to ask for help
Maybe that's not what I need
He elaborates that his difficulty in communicating effectively has clouded and harmed his relationships, so he makes space to take accountability and apologize to the women in his life: his mom, sisters, and partners who have been affected.
He reflects further in the song and in our interview that this self-conflict is a recurring back-and-forth that manifests in clear displays of self-sabotage. In the lyrics,
I’ve built a bridge and never crossed it
He illustrates how, even when he does show up for himself, by making connections or engaging with the community or music scene, he often backs out at the last minute, and fails to “cross the bridge” and fully pursue a bond or opportunity.
Another example is his creative process: he would write pieces only to turn around and discard them, or produce countless tracks and then abandon the equipment that stored them, letting his work gather dust in a forgotten corner. Yet, another voice in his mind urges him to return: music isn’t something he can shake. It remains the anchor that helps him find authenticity and clarity, though it inevitably comes with intense self-reflection and character development.
No one said this shit was easy. By this shit, I mean, the human experience.
However, despite this uphill battle and being “Scared to say,” Conrad does and continues to show up for himself.
From writing lyrics and raps during long-haul truck drives, to spending hours surrounded by creatives making music in the wee morning hours in a Kentucky tattoo shop, to inspiring a clothing line and lifestyle brand called Syco Gang, Conrad turns storylines and symbolism into entrepreneurship and community.
As the founder of Syco Gang which stands for Solace Your Concerns, Observe Greater Awareness Near Grandeur, he’s built more than music, he’s built out his own trajectory for self-awareness, resilience, and growth. Conrad is his own underdog, and continues to create art and pathways that challenge his own self-doubt.
To listen and explore your own journey into self discovery catch “Scared to Say” on Spotify.
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